Monday, June 22, 2009

Late night depression plus some chung

Ok, the fashion blog-thing seems really hard to carry out.
Moreover, nobody is reading this blog.. So I guess I can write anything :)
Today was better than yesterday, no doubts. I woke up quite early, had a delicious breakfast with new (yummy!) cereals, took a long shower, had lunch with my sister and went out with my BFF, looking for some books. I went out tonight, too, and had a great time with my friends. We had some ice cream, attempted to buy cigarettes from a fucking machine (I hated it!) and strolled in the park, chatting and being not so serious. I went home and chatted with a friend, well, not an ordinary friend, but who cares. I suppose the word is quite appropriate, now. He's the one I wrote about in the first post, and then again when I was angry. I really can't get over him (I don't wanna get over you-Magnetic Fields- go listen to it!). Everytime I talk to him, I realize I can't forget him. Every conversation includes laughing, reading brillant things, smiling for the funny words he uses, being amused. Tonight he reminded me of some nights ago, when we met at a concert and I didn't say hello to him. I saw it but did nothing. I know, it's stupid but I really wanted to talk with him, even for little time, but it's not that easy! I saw him and
sono precipitata nella solita dimensione parallela
qualcosa dentro di me ha iniziato a muoversi
ho provato una sensazione assurda
volevo scappare e allo stesso tempo correre da lui
si รจ fermato tutto per un attimo
I invented an excuse, like "I saw you but our eyes didn't meet so I didn't have the chance to", which is half the truth, but he replied that I knew it wasn't true. What the hell did he mean? I understood it perfectly, but I can't understand why he wanted me to say hello to him. I know, we're friends. But it's not so important! Am I important to him? Am I nothing to him? Why can't I get rid of him? And above all, why I don't wanna do it?

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