Wednesday, August 17, 2011
The end of summer is getting closer and, for the first time, I'm not unsatisfied with it. I suppose I've just grown up, and I accept more easily my life and the people I see everyday.. I'm a dreamer, and I often spent summer thinking about what I could do, who I could meet, etc. I've become way more realistic and I'm definitely happier with what I do- I don't feel miserable anymore. Of course, there are some moments when I feel particularly lonely or I just can't stand myself, but I don't dream of becoming an always-smiling girl with billions of friends anymore- I'm ok with my life. Ok, I still go mad sometimes and panic about myself, I will never have enough self confidence, I'm too insecure, but I used to feel like very, very distant from the person I wanted to be, whereas now I just try to improve myself, but I'm way more relaxed. Not like "I spent all the summer indoors, I'm a loser, nobody wants me" but more like "I have incredible friends, I love seeing them, it's been a very nice summer and I'm excited about the future". Maybe I'm a bit less focused on myself, and I'm able to see things that I couldn't see before: the wonderful people around me, the chances I've got, the huge amounts of amazing things that one could do.