Sunday, April 4, 2010

Kaya Scodelario for ASOS

It's after midnight and I'm bored to death. My best friend went round this evening, and we played some stupid games, but now she's come back home and left me with no one but my computer and Donnie Darko. For the 48003 time. I also watched Last Days today, and I have mixed feelings about it. I mean, I sort of enjoyed it, because of the atmosphere and the backgrounds and because I love Nirvana, but it's absurd. There are very few dialogues, it's just Michael Pitt strolling around with a shocked expression on his face and talking nonsense with himself. WTF?
Three days left before coming back to school. Fuck. I still have two years to finish it; on one hand, it seems so much time. I want high school to be over, I can't stand seeing the same faces and doing the same things everyday. But on the other.. I don't want to grow up, and I have no idea what I'm going to do after school. University, I suppose? I mean, I like studying, but nowadays everyone takes for granted that he's going to university, because otherwise he won't find a job etc. I find it stupid, because going to university is a consequence of the fact you like studying, you like that subject, or you're determined to do a certain job.. But if you hate studying, you have no interest in that subject, you don't aim at any career.. Then, I think you should look for your way. It doesn't matter if it's going to university or working, living in Milan or in Paris or in the country, alone or with someone. You have to do what you
really want, or you'll end up wasting your life and being sad all the time, unsatified with your life. You only live once.
[I love that part in Donnie Darko when the girl comes to Donnie's house, and he's throwing a party, and they're listening to Love will tear us apart. It's magic. Joy Division are magic]
BTW, I talk and talk and talk about happiness, but the reality is that I'm not happy. Today I thought I should get rid of all the things that create problems in my life, and all the people that make me suffer. But I'm not sure I'm strong enough.

1 comment:

  1. direi che il film merita,c'è anche chloe sevigny, ma non ti aspettare allegria...