The comeback

I almost miss summer. I like, no, I adore fall, its colours and its rainy weather. Its fallen leaves, its grey sky. Its days perfect for reading, its cold wind. Its frosted cheeks, its scarves. Its hot teas and chocolates served in lovely cafés. Its libraries, its vintage shops. But school has started less than a month ago, and I don't feel like studying at all.. I want empty days to fill in, old films to watch, afternoons dedicated to photos, free mind. No stressing thoughts, just relax. It'd be good, wouldn't it? But I must accept the fact that holidays are over and enjoy these days as much as I can! I can't really complain about them, I'm just going to school, spending time with my friends, having a great time on amazing saturday nights, spending my spare time reading or at the computer. Quelquefois I study, but unfortunately I've got a very weak will-power! :P I just hope there'll be other lovely days for me in the next future. Sadness has, in a certain way, disappeared. Not completely, sometimes I still feel very lonely.. But I'm not so thoughtful, I'm a bit more optimistic. Sometimes I can't stand staying at home and chatting with my parents at dinner, I find it so unbearable that it often causes me headaches. The same conversations all the time, it's so annoying.. But I do enjoy talking with my mom, and I'm content with my actual friendships. Well, more than just content! I've got very few friends, but they never, never let me down. And the guys we met at the end of the summer, well, they're actually amazing! We're still hanging out together, and I must say I've laughed more with them, in the last month, than in my entire summer.
I haven't started seeing the world as a wonderful, amazing place full of graceful, honest and fantastic people. I still find it difficult to rely on them.. And drawbacks are still part of my life. But I'd be an hypocrite if I kept on repeating my life is horrible because, actually, it's not. And it doesn't matter if I sometimes feel insecure and rejected.. Who doesn't? My life is still full of beautiful things I have to dedicate time to.

Parents, oh parents.

Yesterday I spent a great evening with some friends met some days ago. It's amazing when you find yourself at ease with people you've just met! We went to a concert, which was supposed to be set on the beach but, unfortunately, due to the rain, they had to move it into a pub. This means few people, lots of noise and people sweating.. but I had a great time! After the gig we stopped on the road to eat something, and chatted a bit.. well, a lot! My parents didn't like the fact that I came home at 3 AM at all. I hope they'll allow me to go out with them again, because there's no point in forbidding me to do it.. I mean, they're all great guys, I don't understand my parents. They were mad at me, but why?! I came home safe, not drunk or something. There's nothing bad in staying out late if you're with your friends! Moreover, they're kind and responsable; the guys who had to drive drank tea and even refused to taste the beer the others were drinking. I don't know what my parents think we did, but they should trust me. Hope they'll change their minds about it, because I'm so happy we met some new people and went out a bit, instead of doing the same things.

Even an end has a start.

Everytime I decide to go to bed, one of my favourite videoclips starts on Mtv. Damn! Tomorrow I'll feel like crap, but it doesn't matter. I'm excited because I'm meeting the friends I made in Oxford, in July! I didn't believe them when they told me they had decided to come to Milan, I felt so happy :) I'm looking forward to see Giulia again, a girl I met there. At first we didn't talk that much, but I happened to be in class with her, and we became great friends. She's a wonderful person, and we're totally on the same wavelenght!
Apart from that, I'm quite enjoying these last days of summer. Going to the movies, reading Edgar Allan Poe, going to gigs, going to bed late, going to the disco and act like a fool. It's almost better than the whole summer. Proably because we don't actually enjoy something until we know it's ending and can't waste it anymore.

Cant get away from the moment

I am spending lovely evenings with my BFF; we are watching these films we have been wanting to watch for ages, like Pulp Fiction, Reservoir Dogs, Fight club, Mystic River. I usually prefer dramatic movies, but I have recently found out that I love thrillers, noirs and.. Tarantinos movies :D I thought they were too much violent, but this was just a prejudice. We are eating loads of ice-cream, too, and often going for bike rides. I love these evenings... but I am not so enthusiastic about daylife. I feel so lazy, spending hours doing absolutely nothing. Fortunately, school is starting on fourteenth of September. I know I will miss summer and hate school and dramas and teachers, but I am looking forward to a new start and new challenges. I want winter to come :D Or at least autumn. I hate summer weather, it gets too hot. I wanna wear thick sweaters, winter dresses, tights and scarves.. and I miss chatting over a cup of delicious hot chocolate. Now I am off to bed.. Its 3.08 PM.

Goodnight :D

Crisis in the middle of the night

And when I told her I didn't love her anymore

She cried

And when I told her of another girl that caught my eye

She cried

I know it's a question everyobdy has asked himself at least once in his life, but why isn't love endless? Why do things have to end, and most of the time in a horrible way? If two persons love each other, I don't understand how a strong feeling can disappear.

Doubts.

I've just spent a great evening/night with my BFFs! We were hoping to see some shooting stars, but we weren't lucky enough. We sat on a blanket on the road, chatted, smoked, laughed and took loads of photos. Yes, we like to act like tramps :)
I love summer evenings, they're magic.

BTW, I was thinking about writing here in Italian. I started writing in English for several reasons: first of all, as most of the blogs I read are of foreigners, it'd be easier to communicate with them. Anybody would understand me. I'd improve my English. It'd be a challenge. But now I realized that nobody is reading or commenting what I write. Also, I was reading a blog I used to keep, in Italian of course, and I understood that I can't express many things in English. I can't go that far.. And I don't want to limitate my thoughts.
I still don't know, I'm undecided (as usual). Hope that a good night's sleep will help.

Goodnight!

Sorry for the amount of Placebo pictures (in this case Ville Valo+Brian Molko.. not that bad!), but i'm so EXCITED! Today we bought tickets, more than three months in advance. Can't wait! The gig is on 30th of November, in Milan.